Saturday, March 14, 2015

Closing the Philosopher Runner Blog

  I have been fortunate to host this blog for a few years now.  Before this space I wrote on Xanga and before that one was GeoCities.  Each time I changed blogs it was a turning point in my life that closed one chapter in the hope of writing a better one.  I have met a lot of wonderful people through this blog and now its time to turn onto the next chapter: longevity.
  When I began this voyage I hated running.  I ran because my goal was to complete a full ironman and there were too many reports about sharks in the waters off of San Clemente; so instead of a wetsuit I picked up a pair of shoes.  I ran to escape the demons that plagued me for 8 long years that did not allow my life to move forward.  I ran because I was angry at me for being me.
  So I pushed through the garbage inside and found a beautiful running community.  There are so many wonderful stories out there I simply never heard because I was focused on my issues and my goals to notice.  Some of those people are still in my life and others have drifted towards their own happy place.  I gained a love for the suffering that comes along with distance running completing marathons, 50 milers and even a few 100 mile races.  
  But, the place I deposited my emotion became the goal in itself.  I was left with no place to escape.  The last few months I've been sidelined with a tendonitis issue that I cannot shake.  I have gotten out of shape and miss the smell of the morning on the trail.  No races, no starting line, just the smell of sunlight over the hills.  So, starting a new chapter to chronicle reaching a few running goals I have left n the list.  I won't reveal all of them but one of them does involve running through Death Valley at some point.  More than any goal  I just want to run happy again and feel the strength of my own smile.  
  So this blog that was so fueled by anger and rage will close.  I will focus on a different project @ where I hope to keep things simple and start again with a little more experience and hopefully a little more love.

Monday, March 2, 2015

The Treadmill

  I have a healthy relationship with fitness but an unhealthy relationship with gyms.  It really baffles me why I simply can't get over it and learn to love the idea of needing to pay a company to motivate me to move, but like all takes time to see the silver lining.
  I have been sidelined with an injury since Oct 2014 and it has been a steady increase in weight and frustration at my inability to get moving.  The old achilles tendonitis was simply the effect of too many hills and not enough sleep.  But, I am getting married in August so I need to hit the ground running again...enter the gym.
  I joined 24 hour fitness so I could use their pool.  Its a 25 yard lap pool and since my avg visiting time to the gym is 11:30 pm its generally free of people and I can just go in there and do my thing which at this point feel like a lot of catching my breath and resisting the desire to purchase floaties.  Swimming is way harder than I thought and it finishes with me being nice and tired and able to get 8-9 hours of sleep.
  I am thus learning to like the gym a little more now.  I am not as angry when I drive there and I view it as a part of my fitness rather than all of it.  Thinking about the room full of sweaty people as a meaningful part to reaching my goal of getting back to the trails has softened heart towards it.  Who knows I may end up liking this place.